Four Minutes, Nine Seconds

That is how long it took me to drink 64 ounces of orange juice.

 

After once seeing in the newspaper years ago about one columnist’s attempt at drinking a gallon of milk in under one hour, I had always wanted to try it. Over a year ago, I actually tried. I drank most of it, but the last half hour was me mostly laying on my desk groaning in pain. Needless to say, I failed. But I’ve always been able to drink large quantities of juice, and I love orange juice, so I figured half a gallon would be a more reachable goal. So today, my dad and I were at Aldi getting some juice for my younger siblings as a treat because some of my other siblings were with my mom at a concert. So I happened to spot the orange juice and when I brought it up to him, my dad was like “Go for it.” Well how could I resist? So I had only 2 pieces of pizza for dinner and drank nothing else until 8:43. Then, it was time. I set up my camera in the basement on top of the washing machine and pulled out the OJ, ripped the cap off, shook it, and started chugging. I made sure not to try to drink it all in 3 chugs, because that’s completely impossible, so I lowered the increments and made sure to burp as often as possible to keep the air out of my stomach. Eventually as the level got low, the pain in my stomach increased significantly and subsequently my chugging capacity fell, but I was still going. I eventually finished it and went upstairs, my stomach feeling like, well that it was about to explode with half a gallon of orange juice in it. I was in pain for over an hour and just laid on the couch, feeling ridiculously proud of myself. My mom of course thought the whole idea was stupid, but that’s okay. Guys need to push to see their limits and sometimes girls don’t have that streak in them (Not saying it’s everyone of course). My dad was proud that I did it and he was like “I’m glad you felt pain.” Quite honestly it wouldn’t have felt so cool if I wasn’t hurting so badly. So now that I know that my limits are somewhere between drinking a gallon of milk in an hour and a half gallon of orange juice in 4 1/6 minutes. I think it might be a while before I find that middle ground…

Oh, something that I meant to put on this but forgot to do is to do a rundown of the nutrients one ingests from a whole carton of orange juice, so here it is:

Calories: 880

Sodium: 120mg

Potassium: 3,360mg

Carbohydrates: 224g

Sugar: 192g

Protein: 8g

Daily Value Vitamin C: 800%

DV Calcium: 16%

So yes, that’s a lot of calories and sugar. Kind of…

Subway Breakfast

So earlier this morning, well now technically yesterday morning, I got myself a Subway breakfast. A 6” flatbread sandwich with egg, pepper jack cheese, bacon, green peppers, and onions, an English muffin with eggs, pepper jack cheese, and onions, and a little bottle of orange juice. Now one thing you must realize about my family and I is that we hardly ever go out to eat, especially breakfast. We only do that for dinner when we’re on road trips or for special occasions. Another thing you must realize about me is that I’m easily impressed and can take an incredible amount of joy in the miniscule things in life. (Just so no one thinks I’m that great, I can also be so ticked by the smallest things, so it balances). Anyway, I had to clutch the bag in my hand and bike handgrip because my watch said I was late to leave for the Roskam campaign office where I intern, and I hate being late. So I had to wait on devouring my newly bought friends (Which were $3.67 with a coupon, which was partly the reason I went) until I made it to the office. Well, upon wrenching my right hand open and opening up the thankfully still warm sandwiches, I proceeded to eat them carefully in the hallway, listening to the only two people in the office at that time talk about how to get an apartment in D.C. (One of them was going to get an internship there). As I knew we were going door-to-door that day, I somewhat regretted getting the onions, but they were good and I love onions. I think they sort of dominated the English muffin though. But overall, I’d say if I had much more money to throw around, I would definitely be back there more often. Plus the fact that it’s healthy happens to be a conscience assuager. The orange juice was excellent too, though I love orange juice with a passion. Oooh. I’m actually planning on seeing how fast I can drink a half-gallon of it. I have high expectations because I almost succeeded in drinking a gallon of milk in an hour, and orange juice tastes better than milk.

Gee whiz, I’m making a blog post about a breakfast. My narratives are quite all-encompassing and awkwardly thorough. Oh well. That’s why it’s my blog and not yours. If I didn’t want to watch myself think and post about the most mundane things that seem cool to me, I would’ve hired someone else to write this…